Come down to Miami sometime. I'll let you take my car for a spin. It drives perfectly, smooth as silk and extremely responsive. It does none of the symptoms you car has. I have 14K in my '02 Cooper CVT running software updated 33.2, which was installed back in mid May.
I suspect your problems come from the following sources:
1) Defective engine wiring harness
2) Defective throttle body control module
3) Corrupt or incorrectly loaded version of the software
4) If your car is an early 2003 production (Built between Sept-Oct 2003) you may have transmission damage due to the incorrect oil viscosity in the transmission.
Sorry to hear about your problems, but my car runs sooo good it is unbelievable. I can't even feel the engine idle while the A/C is running...is that smooth.
