Thanks for all the feedback, I thought I best update you with progress.
I took the car to the dealer twice, first time they told me the lights were set correctly on their machine and couldn't be set an higher. Next time I took the car over just as they were closing and challenged them to drive around in the dark with me. It took a bit of persuading as it meant obviously the guy had to leave home late, but eventually he agreed. After about 5 mins of scaring the hell out of him by switching to dipped lights on a country lane he agreed that they weren't working correctly!
Anyway, next day they took the car, and sorted things completely. They still aren't quite as good as my old Clio headlights, but they are at least now usuable. I was so pleased that they actually fixed things that I didn't ask what they did, I suspect that the first time around they didn't bother to check them at all and just told me that things were fne, hoping that I'd go away. They are definately set a lot higher now, I can see maybe 3 times the distance, and still with no problem with dazzling oncoming drivers.
It means I can forget my backup plan which was to tape a couple of bike lights to the roof of the car
As an aside I have noticed that a LOT of mini drivers go around with their fog lights on as well (having started to look out for it), so I wonder if other people have this problem as well.